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stupid little heart

by Barabbas T Jones

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1.
Rejoice! 02:13
It can't stay dark forever no matter how hard it tries the sun is just around the corner and soon it will blister our eyes so rejoice! rejoice! when you think it can't get any worse we must fight and we must sing cause there's no such thing as heroes anymore we must be all the things that we want to see in the world and the people we know and we must be all the things that we swore we could be when we thought we would never get old no book or flag is going to save us from our enemies or ourselves no screaming preachers or politicians can rescue us all from this hell so lets decide lets be heroes lets give a little more than we tak so tomorrow when the morning comes we can feel the sun on our face
2.
Lost 03:32
i've loved you longer than I've loved my favorite bands started back when we were only friends don't wanna thing of where id be if you had never chosen me I wanna write a million shitty pop-punk songs just for you that never quite get my point across I'm lost without you so lost without you so please come home right after work I'm always lost in the kitchen or breaking the dishes When each moment is a new and vivid dread or when I'm stuck at the bottom of our bed I know it won't last forever and I'm grateful for the fact but for now I'm just sitting here and I'm waiting for you to come back I swear its like this house just got much bigger without you and there are extra hours in this day I know I said I'd be just fine for a little while without you but now I'm wishing you never went away
3.
I will regret this moment at the end of my life not just this one but I'm sure it will be involved quietly reminding me of all the time I waste I will regret this moment when I die Ive been a ghost since the day I was born my teeth fell out long before that but you put me in a basket and you took me for you own and I pray to God youll never throw me back my legs are strong enough to start walking westward straight into the setting sun I tried my best to settle in, the alarm clock drove me away now these debts and gravity keep me in my place so bury me under the things that I regret and put this song on the very top there is nothing I hate more than the way I think I hope someday we all can forgive me
4.
some bridges you burn with fire and some you burn with words the one that took me to your house got burried under ashes and verbs so I started digging half as fast as I can talk by this time tomorrow morning it should be clear enough to walk I will regret all the moment I spent not being better to you I will regret all the moments I wasted waiting for your dreams to come true some dreams you have while your sleeping and some you work for all of your life the world I wanted to give you disappears at the end of each night so I started working half as much as I love you by this time tomorrow morning the world should be brand new
5.
drinking yourself to death aint as easy as they make it sound the only thing thats killing me is when I take a look around this town so im leaving here tonight darling not even taking time to pack the only thing Im trying to ask is can you leave here and not look back I know youre sick of watching them talk of what they think they know so Im turning the key guitar in the trunk and we'll find a new place to call home dont ask you daddy's permission he wouldn't stop us even if he knew how we'll hop the border to mexico and try to disappear in the crowds I hear the beach is always warm no need to bring your coat but it stays so cold around these parts the only choice is sink of float I know youre sick of watching them kill themselves is so damn slow so Im turning the key guitar in the trunk and we'll find a new place to call home
6.
the moonlight feels like summer it's warm against my skin and the water smells like August when you start to think the heat will never end if the creek don't rise we can take all night if you get scared just put your hand in mine we'll pass the time with honeysuckle wine if I could choose a perfect moment it would be this one I'd try to make it last forever but we both know I never could I know Monday morning's coming to take me away from you thats the weirdest thing about living were all just passing through
7.
its been far too long since I got drunk with my brother it feels like its been a century since we lived at our mothers back when I stood my ground back before I was dying back when my skin was new when you could still catch me crying now weve all grown up I cant say its much of an improvement but I guess these tiny life cycles sneak by before you notice everything I know is made of impermanance and change the only thing you can count on it life is going away we are all becoming clouds someday were all becoming clouds and soon after than we will begin to rain and we will become one with the ground I was far too young to remember the last time I hugged my father I can't remember who stopped first or why we never bothered sometimes I wonder if that's why I hate being touched why my skin feels to me like something slithery and rough and the ground will grow such beautiful plants no worried about money food or time and I won't be scared of the death we all find I will find peace on petal at a time
8.
I've been suppressing my evil with drinking and smoking but I feel every need as a white guy and human to fuck up far more than I know how to fix and I've been denying my desire to call up my family and scream at the tips of my lungs to try and say I'm very sorry for this but someday I will be more than I am now someday I will be better than I know how but someday I will be more than I am now I don't know when But I guess I'll find out hours and hours spent looking at tvs the only thing ive seen more than my own feet I wish I had known how to love myself but I've never been good at dealing with strangers which makes life much harder with a chest full of anger because every day I wake up as somebody else but someday I will be more than I am now someday I will be better than I know how but someday I will be more than I am now I don't know when But I guess I'm finding out

about

I wrote these songs over the last 10 years. I recorded them all within the last month or so using a Tascam and an Ipad. Each track has some back story and the lyrics. I hope you enjoy them or are at least inspired to make some of your own.

credits

released October 6, 2019

My wife painted the album cover.

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Barabbas T Jones Nashville, Tennessee

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